Wiring

I caught up with my second mom earlier in the week and, though short, it was still nice to see how she and the rest of the family were. Somehow, we got onto the topic of the book I was reading on perfectionism, Perfecting Ourselves to Death by Richard Winters and I got told off for not updating the blog on the book. So this is what this post will be about...

All-or-nothing thinking underlies many of the features if unhealthy perfectionism. That line kinda sums me up quite well. I like things in black and white. I hate it when it's grey coz there are so many possibilities. And I get very anxious in situations like that because of the varying possibilities, there is also more chance of getting something wrong. Being a perfectionist, getting something wrong is not an option.

There's always this constant worry about people judging you (though many a times they probably aren't). This thinking revolves around the want and need to please others, keeping them happy. This comes down to the reason why perfectionist do what they do-control.

Unhealthy perfectionism stems from many different sources-broken homes, controlling & unreasonable parents, constant change of environment and the list goes on. In situations like these the potential perfectionist is not in control. This creates angst and a need to be in control. As time goes by, as the need for control increases the potential of becoming an unhealthy perfectionist increases, too. Unless the potential perfectionist addresses this issue early on, it does get worse and becomes harder to reverse the cycle (though it is possible).