Melbourne

It's still rather surreal to think that I was in Melbourne just last weekend. I guess, the thought of me ever being able to head back across the ditch seemed like such a feat. And for it actually happen under such amazing circumstances is, for me, a true miracle.

Since this trip was confirmed, I was bombarded with many questions esp the one that went, "What's it for?". Before the trip, only a handful of people were told as we were told that it was confidential. But now, I can tell then world........

About a month-and-a-half to two months ago, myself and 3 others were privileged enough to be asked to represent AUT and NZ at 2 of the Australian Good Food & Wine Shows-Melbourne & Sydney. And without a doubt, we all said, "YES!".

Basically, it was an all-expenses-paid-for trip across the ditch. We would be employed by Tourism NZ over the 4 days to give them a hand at the shows.

Last year, Tourism NZ took an exhibit to Australia but they did everything themselves, including the food prep. Unfortunately, because they do not normally work with food they got a little too involved in the food prep and in turn their customer relations was compromised. SO they decided to approach AUT to see if they would be interested in working together with them. And I'm sure you know what their answer was...

So the exhibit they took across this year was a slightly revamped version of last year's. The way it was set out was so they it would be like a walk through NZ and sampling wines from the different regions. As you entered the stand, you would pass through Auckland, Hawkes Bay, Wairarapa, Nelson/Marlborough & Waipara Valley/Canterbury. At each stand you would sample the wines from the specific regions and there would be food to accompany the wines.

The food available for sampling were NZ beef, NZ smoked salmon & NZ blue cheese. Each day, we put together approx 6000 pieces of canapes featuring the beef, salmon & blue cheese. I am now officially off blue cheese, smoked salmon & beef for at least the next 2 months! (I used to love 'em all).



So last Thursday, Daniel & I started our day bout 3.30am with last minute packing and off to the airport we went. We checked in at 5.30am and were off the tarmac at 7.30am. We arrived Melb Airport at 9.30am local time and got to the hotel bout 10.45am. It was off to get a quick lunch at a bakery just a few doors up from the hotel. Then it was off to work. Daniel was off to the Sofitel Hotel kitchen with Chef James Thomson and I, to the Exhibition Centre to help with setting up the stand.

At about 3pm, I went back to the Sofitel kitchen to give them a hand with prep-ing for the show as they were running rather behind. I really enjoyed being there and just being to see another hotel's kitchen and to compare it with Sky City's. We finished up bout 6pm and headed back to the hotel we were staying at for a briefing. That finished up about 7.45pm. By that time, Daniel and I were starving and were dying for some food. Though we were extremely exhausted, food was what was on our mind. So we headed up the road to my favourite Vietnamese restaurant. Boy, was it good...

We headed up to Daniel's room, had a nice wind down with a glass of wine each and then bed! By the time we got to sleep it was probably bout 10.30pm Melb time. SO we were up for about 21hrs!!!

The next 3 days went like this: Up at 6am, breakky at 7am and out the hotel door by 8am. We were at the show from 8am to 5pm. On Fri and Sat nite, I caught up with some really good friends and I had a blast. Sunday evening, Daniel & I went to St Kilda and had dinner at Di Stassio. Now, I had some real good meals and some bad ones and Di Stassio falls into the 'bad ones'! (Cuisine Magazine needs to check out their sources and where they get their restaurant reviewers from).

Mon and Tues were probably the most crazy days I had in Melbourne.

I started off Monday with a quick trip up to Melbourne Uni to get mom and dad their much loved uni t-shirts & jumpers. Then it was back to the city to get some bank matter sorted out. That took a little longer than I wanted it to but oh well. I had brunch with Daniel and then I had to nip out to the S.E. suburbs to visit my school.

My second mom, Bronwyn (aka Mrs O), was just classic. (She was my maths teacher in YR 10 & 12 and we got on like a house on fire while I was at PLC. We have kept in touch since and I was always introduced to her friends as her extra daughter). She was ready and waiting at the reception to take me round. It was like I was her long lost daughter and we were seeing each other for the first time. I spent about and hour and a half there. Mrs O made the biggest deal of all that I have been doing and even got my photo taken to be put into the next issue of PLC in Print (the school magazine). It was lovely to see everyone that I wanted to and thought it was extremely rushed I'm glad I did it. And Mrs O, you were so sweet and thanx for the guided tour!



Then it was off to my guardians. I spent the evening with them over dinner that I cooked. It was something that I used to do for them so this was no exception. It went down well, esp with the kids so that was good. The kids can be fussy eaters. After dinner, they dropped me off at BUGS. This was the gym club where I started my coaching career. BUGS is very dear to me and I'm so pleased that to know that I will always have a spot there for me whenever I'm back for good! I was great to see everyone and that BUGS was still going strong.

Tues involved a catch up with Katherine. We headed off to the zoo bout 9.30am and left bout 12.50pm. It was a lovely few hours we spent together catching up and enjoying the animals. Back at the city, we caught up with a friend that we hadn't seen in a long while too. After that quick catch up, we went for lunch at a Thai restaurant near the hotel. Lunch was really good-both food and the company. Then, a mad dash down to the supermarket to get the essentials-Doritos & Kettles chips-and a mad dash back to the hotel to grab my bags and head off to the airport.

We checked-in nice and early and it was another last catch up with another friend that was much like a sister to me while I was at school. So, I made that catch catch up last as long as I could and then I had to go through customs. :(

Off the tarmac we went and arrived back in Auckland At 12.15am on Wed morning! What a crazy trip!

Reflections:
- In many ways, I never left Melbourne. So many things are still there and the same. I still know the city as well as when I left (though I was a little rusty). I still love the place as much as I did.
-But in many ways, so much has changed. The girls I used to coach have all grown up that I didn't recognise them. It took a lot of prompting from the other coached and a lot of concentrating before I realised it was them. Mrs O's younger daughter is now in Yr 12. I remember the day I met her-she was in Yr 6!
-When I do leave, it will be hard-a lot harder then I first thought. Now, Auckland is home. My family is here, support system is here, friends are here, life is here. And without my friends at cession, I don't know where I would be now. But Melb has and will always have a special place in my heart but I know that it will be extremely difficult to say good bye when I do move.

Asia DownUnder

I've kept this real quiet for a while now coz I think it's rather embaressing and it's been made into a bigger deal than it really is. However, I know that most would disagree with me. And I know that if I didn't say anything, especially to those living offshore, when they eventually found out I'd get a complete bollucking.

So, here goes...If you remember me telling you about dad and myself winning a joint award, our local TV 1 got hold of that story and decided they wanted to feature us on one of their programs-Asia DownUnder. Well, they did the filming last Wednesday and it will be screening this coming Sunday, June 2.

If you are at all interested, tune in to TV 1 @ 8.30am on Sunday. For those not living in NZ, you are able to watch it on their website. If you are watching on the website, give it a few days to a week for them to upload it.

Hope you enjoy it... :)

Melbourne, HERE I COME!

I'm going!!!! I received a much awaited email on Thursday saying that they have approved my visa application for my trip in 19 days (and counting) time.

I'm so excited...This is truly an answered prayer. Thanx for all your prayers too.

I really can't believe it. It still feels so surreal. Never really thought this day would come.

I don't think it'll hit m til I actually get on that plane and it leaves the tarmac.

It's gonna be an extremely crazy and busy 5 days filled with very very hard work and a truck load of fun! I can't wait...

Now I just have to hang out til May 31...

Celebrating my 100th post with some masterpieces

I'm half way through my 2nd term at uni and it's been going well. I've been surprising myself with what I am now able to do more and more as we tackle new recipes. Must say, I am definitely a little more patient now when it comes to attempting new pastry recipes.

So to celebrate me finally getting to post number 100, here are some of my latest masterpieces...Enjoy!

My gingerbread house:







Fully iced fruit cake:





Mazipan roses:

Once in a lifetime

I still can't believe I'm writing this post!

Yesterday, myself and another girl from class were asked to stay back after class coz our lecturer wanted to have a chat with us. My immediate thought was, "Oh crap! What have I done now....". But I was wrong!

We were hand picked by the uni to go to Australia (either Melb or Sydney) for 5 days in June. ***Unfortunately, that is all I can say for now because we have been told it is confidential.

I guess the reason why I am so stoked is the fact that I was hand chosen but also that it is praticaly a free trip! All expeneses paid for-accomodation, flights, meals, transportation even $400 just for helping out. I get a free trip to Melb and an extra one for the year...

However, the only thing stopping me from going is a lovely thing called a visa. As most of you know, I was not allowed back into Asutralia for 3 yrs since the day I left. Even though my 3 yrs are up, there is still this seed of doubt that I may not get it approved. So I would really appreciate your prayers about this...

Aside form really wanting to go back to Melb and see my friends, this trip is also a once in a lifetime opprotunity and may open doors for me for when I eventually head back to Melb to settle.

Off duty

This has been long time coming. As of May, I am officially relieved from chow duty. I am excited, apprehensive, relief all in one. It's something that has been on the agenda for a while but couldn't really happen as at the time, cession had just made their big move to our own building. And the last thing chow needed was to start from scratch with a leader saying goodbye. So we decided that we would hold off on the decision for me to let go of that position til later.

"Later" eventually came a few weeks back while Melissa, Juanita & I met for a leadership development session for me. It actually happen so quickly that I wasn't really sure if I was comfortable about the decision we made. But since then, I am quite happy with our decision.

I was getting quite over feeling so pressured about chow paperwork each week. The challenge of 'running' chow was gone. It became more of a job. So I guess it was a wise decision.

SO what will I be up to now? I've been put in charge of anything food related for he slightly larger scale events that cession runs-things like Sunday nite cafes and marriage course meals etc etc.

This is probably a little more up my alley. I'm looking forward to a few years of being part of this ministry. After that, we'll see what happens. The first event I have to organise is already fast approaching. No rest for me...beter start planning! :)

Long overdue

Yes...I have been slack-not updating etc. Unfortunately, I just seem to be getting busier and busier each year. I know that often it is by choice but sometimes I really don't understand how I can be busier and more swamped with paperwork when I seem to not have taken on anymore. ANYHOW...

SO this post is definitely long overdue. About late mid March, I received a rather unexpected call from my Program Leader (AUT) at a very peculiar hour of the day-8pm! I answered the call in a rather worried voice as Glenys informed me that she had a back log of stuff to do and I was on that list of things to do. I'm thinking, "Oh crap! What have I done wrong now to receive a phone call at this hour?!". But much to my surprise, it was actually to inform me that I had won an award for the previous academic year that I was enrolled at AUT. And to add to the surprise...dad won the award too! Yes, we were joint receipients of this award! A first for AUT...

So off I went home and told dad about it. He was quite pleased, too. And her I was thinking that was that and looking forward to the awards ceremony.

Then the next day, I received another call from Glenys saying that news got round AUT and dad and I were making local celebreties of ourselves-AUT communications dept wanted to do a write about dad and I winning this award. So I said ok. I guess it wouldn't do any harm.

Long story short, we had an interview and photos taken. Here are some photos and a link to the article.

*I tried to put on some photos but I think the files were too big to be able to uploaded. I'll try again later. Enjoy the article anyway.

3 years on...

Boy does time fly...

As of Monday, March 26, I have been in NZ for 3 yrs. I just don't believe it! I made it. I survived, still alive and sane (depending on what your definition of sane is). As of this date too, I am allowed back in Australia!!! Hurray...

I guess, I can't honestly say I have had such a testing year til now. So much has happened and still is happening. I graduated (this I never thought will happen) with a diploma, started working full time, competing at Nationals, finding out that I have a stuffed up tendon and am now back studying full time (glutton for punishment is what you call this!). In the midst of all that, the church I'm part of relocated and we now have our own building. This meant setting up new systems- still an ongoing process of trials and errors, building new relationships with other tenants that share the building, bigger and crazier, more exciting events.

The biggest journey I have been on this last 3 years is the journey of discovery; discovering who I am, why I function the way I function, how to make me a better me, who is God in my life, why is God in my life. I often still don't understand me. But it does amaze me that there are other people around me that get me more than I do. It's like I'm this book that you can read page by page. Hhhmmm....

So how does being a graduate feel? Rather surreal actually. It feels bizarre to be out in the working world. Getting up each day and going to work. When you are little, you seem in so much of a hurry to grow up but when the time comes to do just that you only wish you could turn the clock back. Having said that, it has been good to have started off my career at Skycity. To have that on my CV for future job applications will be of great help. I have learnt a lot through working there and interacting with people who work there.

Being chosen to compete at Nationals was just an amazing experience. Definitely one that I do not regret. Made friends and learnt heaps. What else could you ask for. Gave me a different understanding of competitive cooking, a new found respect. It was a very tiring 3 days of competition, a feeling I had never really experienced before and never have since. Maybe I will feel it again when I compete again...

cession is still going strong. I am still enjoying being part of this community (cession would be the one thing that keeps me from going back to Australia). As I said earlier, we now have a place to call our own. It was a very exciting time. Kinda scary in a way too (for me anyway) but definitely looked forward to. On the chow front, kitchen facilities are at times rather testing but we cope. Creativity and innovative spirit is put to the test. But no matter the situation, the meal still arrives at the servery, piping hot to feed the hungry crowd. Mission accomplished! :)

So how is being back at uni? Good and bad. Good coz I still enjoy learning. I enjoy the different kind of relationship I now have with the lecturers. More like friends than student-lecturer. Good coz I have a new found respect for pastry. I'm not as bad as I was/ I thought I might. Bad coz I am poor again! It's not the same without my old classmates. bad coz I can never switch my brain off. It is constantly running with the million things I have to do. Bad coz I am back to having double digit weeks, with days off few and scarce. Do I regret my choice? No. I'm glad I'm doing what I am doing now.

On another note, the injury to my right thumb tendon is official screwed. I've been on 2 types of anti inflammatories, 1 round of cortisone, (not enough rest), countless physio sessions and we are now looking at surgery! Yea, I'm pissed off and annoyed. I've been in a freaking splint on and off for 10 weeks since end of Oct and then permanently for the last 4 weeks. It is a pain in a butt. Every time I think it's getting better, it doesn't. Just chop me hand off, somebody.....

Anyway, so what does this next year have instore for me? Buggered if I know! I guess, what I hope from it is that my citizenship application goes through (I am yet to finish the application and post it off), make a much needed trip back to Melb to see everyone and do a big catch up, pass uni and probably the most important thing is to know me.

What kind of doughnut are you?

I found this off Ryan's blog as I was wondering through cyberspace....

You Are a Powdered Devil's Food Donut

A total sweetheart on the outside, you love to fool people with your innocent image. On the inside you're a little darker, richer, and more complex. You're a hedonist who demands more than one pleasure at a time. Decadent and daring, you test the limits of human indulgence.

What Donut Are You?

What is going on?

I've been putting off writing this post for a little while now. Not because I can't find the time or couldn't be bothered but because it's a hard post to write. I'm not as worried about the big wide world reading about me and my life but more worried about the fact that by the time you finish reading this post, those close to me will know what's been happening in my life over the past few weeks. I guess, it's a case of being afraid to let others near me....

(Advance warning: if you do choose to read on, please do not be offended. It purely reflects me and what's been going on in my head.)

A lot of this may not make much sense but so I can try make sense of things, here goes:

Lately, I've been feeling a strange distance with people. It feels like there's a wall being built around me and it's getting higher and higher, bit by bit everyday. It may well be something I'm doing consciously or unconsciously. It seems very hard trying to connect with others, even feeling rather uncomfortable. Trying to start conversations aren't too successful, they just seem to dissipate into nothing-ness. I'd much rather be on my own, away from crowds.

Last Sunday was the 1st Sunday I'd miss church in a long long time. When it was decided that we where going out for dinner that nite with the family, I was pretty bummed. I don't like missing church and it's so much apart of my Sunday routine that it didn't feel right. But when Sunday came round and we headed out for dinner, I actually really enjoyed being away. A sense of being able to breath again, I guess. A sense of relief, of fresh air...

I'm finding it hard to trust people again. Not that the trust has been abused or they have been in trustworthy but I'm just finding it hard to open up and let people know when I need help or am nor doing too well and just want a chat. Again, this wall.

I guess, being back to uni without my usual bunch of friends is rather surreal. I'm still trying to get used to it. By trying to deal with this, I've just found it easier to make myself this lil box and stay in it.

The frustration of 'searching' for God is ever growing. It just seems the more I look the harder it gets. I often ask myself, "Why bother?". It just feels like I'm back at square 1. All the 'work' and 'effort' I put in before just seems like a waste of time. It all came to nothing...

Runaway Vacation

At 3.31pm on Friday arvo, I officially finished full time work at Rebo. I was on leave...

On Saturday, the plan was for Becs and I to head down to Tauranga. However, on Fri evening our plans changed in a matter or minutes (10 mins to be exact). The plans went from a day trip to Tauranga to a weekend roadtrip to Tauranga & Taupo with no real plans for accommodation or food except for lunch at a hotel where my friends worked in Tauranga on Saturday.

It was by far the craziest thing I'd ever decided to do in such a short period of time!

So we set off towards State Highway 1 at 10.15am. It was mostly a pleasant drive to Tauranga via Matamata. The first leg of the trip (to Matamata) took about 3hrs. After a quick dunny stop and getting ourselves a map we headed towards Tauranga. That took another hour or so.

I really enjoyed lunch. It was great to have a catch up with my uni mates after such a long time. Unfortunately the rain decided to join us and we had to make a quick dash into the dining hall as we were sitting on the deck enjoying the 5 mins of sun.

We got a quick tour of the kitchen and the rest of the hotel and then I bid adieu to my friends and we headed towards Taupo. Now...neither Becs nor I expected this drive to take 2 whole hrs!!! We seriously thought it would only take half that time. Oh well...It was still a great time we had together.

As we drove my 'Sponge bob' into Taupo, we headed to a backpackers that Becs knew about in hopes for a spare room for the nite. Unfortunately, (we kinda expected it) they were booked out. Our next plan of action was pretty much walk into any backpackers that we next came across and see if thy had any spare rooms. WE got lucky this time. The next one we walked into said "Sure! We have 1 room left". So we made the necessary payments and 'moved' in for the nite.

After settling in, we headed for the waterfront in search of our next meal. As we strolled down the street, I spotted a very flash looking bottle shop called Scenic Cellars, Trinity Hill and as you'd imagine I dragged Becs in so that I could have a nice look around. I was extremely impressed! Their range was just absolutely fab-the French, Italian & local wines were just absolutely top of the range. However, I did sense Becs' boredom starting to really boil so I asked what time they closed and said I'd come back later.

So we continued on our search for the nite's grub. We passed many cafes, pub restaurants and restaurants. Most didn't tickle our fancy but we eventually settled on Thai. Dinner was lovely-one of the better Thai meals I've had. I generally find most Thai meals here way too sweet and the main flavours drown by the sweetness. As an end result...a confused meal-was that the main course or dessert?

Anyhow....after dinner, it was a lovely stroll down the other side of the road by the actual waterfront. We took some photos:

As the sun sets...

As we took the last few photos we wanted, I dragged Becs back into the bottle shop. This time, I went in asking for exactly what I wanted; a bottle of Sauterne & a bottle of Chianti Classico. Having just rattled off this, sounding like I really knew what I was talking about we were taken down to the cellar. OH MY GOODNESS!!!! I'm so glad dad said to get these wines....It was beautiful! It was split levelled and probably twice the size of the Depot if it were all combined and made into 1 level. It smelled of the wooden boxes that the wines came packaged in, just gorgeous. And the selection got better as we walked down the stairs. I was in heaven-well not literally but you get my drift. We spent another good 30mins down there as the sales lady showed me a few other bottles. The Sauterne was a definite but I was undecided on the red. Alas, after much debating with myself, I decided on a bottle of Brunello & a bottle of Nebbiolo.

I sensed that Becs' excitement levels were continuing to dwindle so up we went back up the stairs to the cashier and paid. Then it was off to the scenic lookout for a few more photos.

Sunset in Taupo...

This, we just had to take. How can you not?

The rest of the nite was pretty low key. It was back to our room, 2 rounds of Rummikub and then we hit the sack at 9.30pm. I was knackered! Having done majority of the driving, I was definitely ready for bed at 9.30pm.

The next day, we were up about 8am. Had a shower and packed. We were out of the backpackers bout 8.45am and headed to the bungy area for a nice morning stroll and more photos.

At 9am on a Sunday morning, who would have thought that there were people crazy enough to bungy off this platform?! But we witnessed it...

After our stroll, we headed back to the waterfront for brekkie. It was a plate each of pancakes, fried eggs, bacon & hash browns with a glass of juice and a coffee. Not a bad brekkie. Sure lasted us a LONG while.

It was back on the road and towards Huka Falls after the huge brekkie. It was my first time to the falls and it was a bummer that we couldn't stay longer to do some of the walks. Oh well, there's always next time. I truly love the sounds of water breaking, beit on the beach or at the falls. We were also graced with the presence of the jet boats.

The rapids as they slowly head for the edge and become the Falls

Huka Falls

Huka jets

All adventures must come to an end and this was ours. We both had to get back in time for church commitments so this trip was short. SO we headed back up State Highway 1 towards Auckland. We did make some stops along the way for petrol (Putaruru) and to replenish our famished souls (Hamilton). We arrived safe and sound back in Auckland about 4pm-ish.

All in all, a great lil' adventure. Would I do it again? HELL YEA! Still by far the craziest thing i have ever done but dare I say, I had a blast...So, thanx Becs for the great idea.

An evening at Long Bay

Last nite, Rebecca and I headed to Long Bay beach for fish & chips. It had been a long while since I was last at Long Bay and it is def my favourite beach. We had a lovely dinner and relaxing evening to end my working week...

Our fish & chips dinner from the local takeaway joint in Torbay.

These sea gulls decided to grace us with their presence & sing to us. We even received an encore!

As the sun sets....

A post of sorts

My first official post of the New Year....I've been pretty slack with postings lately. Oh well....wouldn't be the first time! Anywayz, so what's been the haps?

X'mas eve service was a rather quiet affair as most of the community had already headed away for their holiday or had family get-togethers. The highlight of the service would definitely have to be smelling the fresh bread cooking away in the corner with the intent of using it for communion. However, it didn't work and we had chocolate as a substitute......

The following week included working both stat days and moving to Sandringham to house sit. For 2 weeks, I had an entire 2 bedroom Victorian house to myself. A lovely backyard ready with rows of lettuce, herbs & fruit for me to harvest and have for many dinners to come. A magnificent kitchen filled with an awesome larder and well stashed cupboard with good equipment. The lounge decked out with a plasma screen. This was all mine for 2 whole weeks. Oh, and it was only 10 mins from work! It was fab to be able to get home before 4.15pm. I had never had that treat before. No traffic too!

I left today to head back home to my parents. I will definitely miss having a place to call my own. I wasn't quite sure just how much I'd enjoy being alone but I must say, I HAD A BLAST! It was great just to have my own space, esp after a long mad day at work. I'm gonna find it hard to be back at home again but I'm sure I'll cope...So if anyone needs a house sitter, I'm offering my services!!! :)

As for what I was up to for New Year's, I pulled an extra long shift on New Year's Eve only to get 4 hrs sleep and head back to work again the next morning. I didn't get a sleep in til the following Sat as I was on morning shifts. It was a hard week but hey...the pay cheque looked good.

As I count the weeks down, we are getting closer and closer to Feb 19. The day I start back at uni! I'm really looking forward to it...(as I'm sure you already know. Sorry to bore you). It's also getting closer to the week I'm' taking off from work before I head back to uni. I've got many fun things planned already but it does include a cortisone jab to start the week off though.

It has come the point where I need to get the jab coz my wrist just isn't getting better. Hopefully I won't be in too much pain!

For the past 2.5 months I have been rostered on what dad and I call 'honeymoon' shifts-Mon to Fri, 7am-3.30pm. Why honeymoon? Because these shifts are virtually non-existent to any chef in the industry esp for a commi....I've been really stoked to have all my nights & weekends free but above all, it's just been great to be in a routine and be able to plan ahead! I'm glad I've been able to prove myself to deserve these shifts. Let's hope it stays this way til I start uni. That'll be brilliant!

Well, I'm not one that likes New Year's resolutions...actually I hate them! Who ever achieves/keeps to the resolutions made?! Probably close to no one!!!! But I don't mind the idea of having some things in mind to aim towards; more like goals. So here are some of mine for the year:

1. Get back into some sort of routine with scripture reading and other reading. I've been falling seriously behind since starting full time work. Just being so tired physically and mentally, the last thing I want to do is read.
2. Get active! Again, due to full time work I have had no motivation (apart from the ever increasing kilos) to go for walks or runs or swims. At the moment, I'm looking into some dance classes but before that trying to fit in at least 1 run/walk a week.

SO here's to 2007.....Let it be an awesome year!

New Look

I finally got round to changing things round on my blog. I know it is still a little bare....In time, I'll get it back up to scratch.

Til then.....

Meanderings

It's been a long while since I last posted...I know, I'm bad at updating and shouldn't hassle others about not updating too.

Life as a full time chef is finally starting to become more acceptable (for lack of better word)-the lack of structure in rosters, unsociable hours, ridiculous demands on the body due to lack of sleep & proper nourishment......bla bla bla and the list goes on. I am still getting used to it and am in a constant state of knackered-ness but I'm slowly coming to terms with the nature of the industry.

About a month ago, I finally dragged my rear end to a physio to find out what was wrong with my thumb/wrist. It had been sore (& occasionally really painful) for a good few months but I thought it'd go away after while and I was just getting used to full time work. But it never went away and got worse. So it was off to the physio, then to a GP to get ACC. Since then, after a heap of forms to fill in (this is coz I am an accredited employee-way too many procedures to go through!), I finally got my claim approved. That's the good news. The bad news is there is a high chance of my needing to get cortisone injections!!! I'm not looking forward to those but if it doesn't get any better soon it's not a choice. In the mean time, I'm working in a constant state of sore-ness....

I don't regret the career path I have chosen despite all the negatives of the job. I still remember the sense of familiarity I felt on my first day of work and that is what gets me out of bed each day despite how tired I feel. I enjoy the challenge of a busy service-docket machine screaming at a rate of 1 docket per second, the head chef calling out the dockets at the top of his lungs, each chef from his/her various sections trying to gage how far away the others are so that all the food from every section can come up at once for a certain table. This rush can go on for anywhere between 5 mins and 2 hrs at a time. As the rush dies down, this is the calm before the storm, we catch our breath before the next hit comes and it starts again.

As we head into the festive season, the level of busyness increases and so do the stress levels of everyone else. I am both looking forward to it as well as not looking forward to it. The bad thing is that our work load has doubled and tripled so that we are always on top of things and not running out of food but the good thing is that there will be no time for thumb-twiddling and that I am that much closer to heading back to full time study!

Yes...only 10 weeks and 1 day to go before I start back at uni. I'm very much looking forward to it-the structured weeks/months/years and ability for me to plan ahead. It'll be a cruisee 2 yrs of study because I have papers that I am able to cross credit from my previous course plus I have knowledge from that too. So I am going in armed rather than aimless...I feel good about it. I hope I'll still be saying the same when I start-do remind about this when I am moaning and complaining about going back to study!

Something that I am exceptionally bad at is keeping a routine with my bible reading. I'm sure I'm not the only one but that's no excuse. However, on the odd occasion I get my A into G, I have been working my way (though rather slowly) through Philippians. A verse that as been playing through my head over and over again (this doesn't happen often, so I figured I should take notice of it) is Philippians 2:3. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves.

Well...when I was reading this verse many thoughts raced through my head. I figured it is a pretty straight forward verse-be nice to others, don't walk round with a big head, be humble, do things for the betterment of others. That's all good and I get that but the bit that stuck in my head most of all is "but in humility consider others better than yourselves".

The bible is so often taken out if context and this verse is no exception. Of course you shouldn't walk around with your nose in the air with a big head and thinking you're all that. However, it's easy for someone like me to take that verse and do what I do-constantly put yourself down. When do we cross the line of being humble to putting ourselves down? When is considering others better than you become self destructive? Nothing I do is ever good enough, it can always be better. Even when 'perfection' has been achieved, it's still not good enough. I rarely say I am happy with what I produce and when I do no one knows quite how to handle it...

Something I need to work on is to be happy with what I have done/produce. Maybe not just happy or satisfied but proud of what is. I know it won't be easy, it's something that other have been helping me work at and we are progressing-though rather slowly.

For the love of study

This must be the epitomy of my madness! So...there has been an opportunity for a promotion coming and I found out about it a week ago. It is for the next rank up (Demi chef) from the one I'm currently at(Commi chef) and promotion includes a pay rise too. When I found out about this, I kinda dropped hints about wanting it-not so much for the money but more for the recognition for the amount of work I do. But at the time, he didn't seem like he was going to nominate me for that position to the Exec chef so I just left it as is.

Last nite, the head chef approached me and asked if I was still going back to study next year and I gave him an adament 'yes'. And I then found out that I was going to get the promotion had I not decided that I'm going back to uni.

So I'm a little bummed....

I can still decide to not go to uni and get a promotion instead but I think studying is something I really want to do at this stage. But some prayers on this subject would be great appreciated.

Breaking news!!

Yes, I'm heading back to AUT next year for another 2 years. Term commences on Feb 19, 2007.

So what will I be studying? Well........wait for it...................

DIPLOMA IN PATISSERIE

Crazy isn't it?! But then again, what's new? It is Jean we're talking about, remember?

The birthday that was...

So I celebrated my 21st birthday a couple of Saturdays ago. The actual day was pretty shocking-having had to work the graveyard shifts that weekend plus heading to the Mercy work straight from work. That weekend was a nightmare, surviving 3 days with a mere 12hrs sleep! Oh well, we got through it.

But I took Monday off to go to the NZ Culinary Fare & Hospitality show. It was a great day with dad-catching up with some people that I met while in Wellington and just being able to be a spectator rather than a competitor. I did miss the competition excitement though...Then later that evening, I spent the nite over dinner with the Jones', Snell's, Megs & Becs @ Molten. So that was more of a birthday day than my actual birthday. It was good.

Dinner was beautiful...I'll try and get some photos up soon.

So what's been happening? I've been extremely busy at work-pulling a double shift this pass Thursday so I could get my Sunday nite off. Not sure if I'd do it again though! But it was worth it just so I could get my Sunday off.

I'm still very busy with paper work for chow. It's not a bad thing but it does get a little overwhelming at times, esp when I'm exceptionally tired from work and just don't have the brain capacity to cope with having to sit in front of the computer for a few hours. But it still is enjoyable and rewarding for the most part.

I've been doing some thinking (shock! horror!) about what I want to do next year. At the moment, flatting is quite high on the agenda. I have people to do it with and everything. However, there are some serious thoughts of going back to uni to study Pastry. And with the Diploma I currently have, I'm eligible to go straight into 2nd yr Diploma in Patisserie. If I do so, the flatting option goes out the window coz i won't have enough $$ to be able to afford it. I'm still undecided at the moment....

Having said that, I'm having brunch with Alan (my lecturer/trainer) and Arno (trainer for pastry) this weekend @ Bracu, located in Bombay. So I'll definitely be having a good chat with them about whether or not it's a good idea for me to head into 2nd Pastry. I'll only do it if I can get into 2nd yr. Anyway, I'm really looking forward to brunch. Bracu is said to have great food and is situated next to olive groves. So it should be a delicious & beautiful day...

So if I head back to uni next yr, I'm seriously contemplating competing in NZ Culinary Fare in the Toque D'Or category. It's a highly prized addition to the CV and should be a blast. What's even better is it's a team event-so hopefully a little less scary. But we'll see...I'm trying not to get too ahead of myself.

Well, I think that's about all that's been happening in the mad life of Jean. Til the next installment...

Lessons of survival

Amidst of the hustle and bustle of the Rebo kitchen, I was tucked away in a corner cleaning some mussels that were needed for service that nite. While stuck with the tedious and lonesome job of mussel cleaning, my thoughts started to drift from getting the mussels cleaned in time to the various events in my life over the past week.

Recently, I've been feeling really overwhelmed. What with? Work, ministry, life at home & just life in general. And as Melissa puts it, "You seem to be back in that high stressed state". Well, she's not wrong!

From these 'events' that have been happening, there have been many lessons learnt-both new & old. So what are they?

1. If I'm the absolute crap, I can't shut people out no matter how hard I try. It's when I need to let people in most. However, when I do so, I've noticed the hurt that results in my actions. It's not pleasant-for anyone. So how do I solve this prob? On to lesson number 2...
2. Learn to let people in-esp those to care. But how do I do that when my trust for other is rather limited for fear of getting hurt? I was once advice by a very wise man, that the only way to learn to trust again is to trust...A viscous cycle, isn't it?
3. Communicating is lesson number 3. And by doing so, I guess I'm aiding lesson number 2. I'm not very good with letting other know how I'm feeling. I generally brush it off by putting on a big smile and saying, "I'm great, and how bout you?!". It's just the easiest way of avoiding having to face the issues I'm having to deal with.
4. When most people greet you with "Hi, how are you?", when is "I'm fine" an ok answer to give and when is it a lie? My dear friend Katherine and I once had a chat about this...When someone who genuinely cares about you asks if you are ok and you say you are great when you are not, what does that say about you and the relationship you have with that person? if you love that person enough, shouldn't you allow them to be there for you when they are offering a shoulder to cry on or an ear to vent your frustrations? How would you feel if you were in the other person's shoes...trying to help but continuously being pushed away and left wondering what they real prob actually is?

So, it hasn't been an easy pass few weeks. But thanx to those who have put up with my antics ( you know who you are), I've been coping better. Thanx for being you, for being there and still being there despite me being crazy, mad me...I really appreciate it.

3rd place/exceptions/tolerance

So I'm back from a week in Windy Wellington. It was a good experience and I would go through it all over again- but maybe not til next year! It was stressful and absolutely draining but fun. After a 3 day cook-off, I managed a bronze medal. Yea, I'm pleased but not stoked...I really wanted to win it. However, I knew gold was out of the question after day 3 was over so I was only wanting to place.

It's taken a while for the brain to recover; yesterday was hard! Even driving was a mission, it required A LOT of concentration. I'm coping better today. So I'm back to work tomorrow. *groan* Unfortunately, I'm back to nite shifts. That does suck but not as much as being rostered on for a Sunday nite! I'm really annoyed by that so hopefully I'll be able to sort it out when I get back tomorrow.

A few things have cropped up since being back from Nationals and it's caused me to reflect on the exceptions (or lack of) that we make and level of tolerance we have for others. (I'm not going to elaborate on what it was that happened that brought upon this reflection coz there is no need to. )

How do we determine who are the people in our lives that receive more grace than others? What makes them more special or deserving? Is it because they have shown us the level of tolerance that we show them, if not more? Or is it because we crave acceptance from the other party(s)? What is it that drives us to crave that acceptance when that really isn't all that important in the wider scheme of things?

Some things to ponder on...